Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Naming IT

Nine days of being a nonsmoker and I am feeling good. Oh yeah, there are some really annoying and irritating body/mind things going at times - that is the price I must pay to free myself.

Weird how we fool ourselves - the cigarette pack says, "smoking can be hazardous to your health." "I know that," we say dismissively as we light another cancer stick. I have come to the deep understanding that smoking is nicotine addiction and I am in the process of ending that addiction and reclaiming my life. "Smoking may be hazardous to your health" is one of those masterpieces of understatement.

When Tom died, I had quit smoking and took it up again because of the "stress". Well, now I know in the deepest parts of me that smoking doesn't mitigate stress, it causes more of it.

A cigarette is an inanimate object - a little tube of white paper with some dried weeds (and lots of poisonous chemicals) wrapped inside. The addictive drug nicotine is the reason we crave more and more cigarettes - it drives us to repeatedly inhale carbon monoxide into our lungs. When was the last time anyone had a burning desire to go into the garage and put their lips around the exhaust pipe? Acknowledging addiction changes everything - getting out of denial and living here in the real world - I will not smoke again, ever, no matter what happens.

My mantra - a cigarette doesn't solve any problem or stressful situation. I feel so fortunate to be here this morning and to be able to take this healing journey. Quitting is another step on the journey to a new life.


  1. Suzann, I just found you through Fran from Sacred Ordinary. This post about quit smoking is very important. Did you know Naomi from OldOldLady Of The Hills? Her blog is great and she wrote a post about cigarette. Worth to take a look:

    I bookmark you and I wll return soon! Have a happy week!

  2. {{{{{Suzann}}}}}}}
    you can do this girl...just think how much better your life is without cigarettes...I'm sooo proud of you...

  3. :-)

    That's all... just smiling at your victory.

  4. Way to go, Suzann. In the 12 step world it is often said that nicotine addiction can be as tough to kick as heroin. Fortunately, I never enjoyed smoking so have probably smoked a pack perhaps--when I was 17. Now--I have some addictions myself, however--and bed time snacking is one of them. I'm just in the process of kicking this habit -- again -- third time in six months. And you know what? In my case, and I'm wondering if you find any correlation yourself, that snacking thing started when my last "man in my bed" relatiionship ended 9 years ago. Here I know all this, but--

    Anyhow, hang in there. Cold turkey, or are you using a patch or program?

  5. Nine days...but who's counting? WE ALL ARE....counting right along with you sweetie. It's a huge accomplishment Suzann. Keep your conviction...you are SO right to do this for yourself. You are a beautiful lady with a beautiful soul...((((((BIG HUGS))))))

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