Sunday, February 28, 2010

Dreams of Spring

We have been enjoying the most wonderful weather here in Minnesota.  Brilliant sun, clear blue skies, and temps in the 40's - yesterday it was warmer here than in Jacksonville, Florida!! 

This has been a tough winter everywhere - and like most, I am ready for Spring!  Yesterday I put my snowman and snow-woman collection away and brought out the pastel, the bunnies, the chickies and all the little things that shout new beginnings - rebirth and the warming earth outside my window.

Here is my table dressed for Spring - beautiful yellow and pink striped tulips.  My little bunny pulling a wagon full of tiny pink chicks.  
Today I am taking my dear friend Bonnie for Brunch to celebrate her Birthday.  Two years ago, I had a little birthday party for Bonnie at my house and we had one of the most brutal snow storms we have had in quite awhile.  Bonnie ended up staying two days while we dug out.  Here are some photos of that weekend. 



Thank goodness today is 45 degrees and the snow is melting.  I am happy to spend time with Bonnie today and celebrate her special day.  So I leave you with dreams of Spring.   From the barren depths of Winter comes grace, healing, warmth and rebirth - Namaste.

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Thought for a Sunny End of Winter Morning

Be content to progress in slow steps until 
you have legs to run and wings with which to fly.

Padre Pio
Quiet Moments with Padre Pio (Patricia Treece ed.)

Have a Happy Thursday - Spring seems to be on the way.

Sunday, February 14, 2010


I know that Valentine's Day is a made-up - Hallmark Card holiday.  I know that it drives us widders (and others) crazy.  I know real love and it is not a cheesy Hallmark kind of thing.

Today is five and one-quarter years or 1,919 days since Tom died.  I can trace back in my heart and soul how far I have come on this journey.  I remember the first year - OMG!  I was a walking zombie - walking with tears streaming down my face most of the time (or weeping at the slightest or absolutely no provocation).  

Today I think of the amazing things that so many people did for me.  On that first Valentines Day in 2005 - I walked into my office, sometime in the late afternoon, to find an incredible bouquet of red, red roses sitting on my desk with a card that said, "Happy Valentines Day from Tom and Me - Love, Lisa" my dearest friend and Evil Twin - who was the first person to arrive at the hospital after both of the bad, bad strokes.  The first person I met when I arrived in Minnesota in 1988.   The woman who gave me sapphire and diamond earrings "from Tom" on my 60th birthday.  One of the people I treasure beyond measure - today and forever.

Last night I watched the movie, "The Time Travelers Wife," which is adapted from one of my favorite books.  At the end of the DVD I couldn't help but wonder:  what it would be like to be able to hold (really hold)  Tom one more time, even if just for a minute.  Today, a few tears have been shed for my love - he whose body is forever gone from me.

It is true that I will love and long for Tom until I leave this earth.  I continue to be filled with deep appreciation that I was given the gift and gave in return, unconditional love.  That love and the grief journey have forever transformed me and transformed my life.  I am a strong and independent woman.  I have good boundaries and I give of myself to others.  I am filled with gratitude at the enormous blessings in my life.  

Thank you to Lisa, and to Joan, and Patsy, and Missy, and Vanessa and Bonnie and Heidi and all the rest - you who know who you are - you, who have walked beside me on this widowed road.  I could never stand here today strong, whole and as healed as I am without each of you.  Namaste.


Monday, February 08, 2010

Living from the Heart

Wholeheartedness is a precious gift, but no one can actually give it to you. You have to find the path that has heart and then walk it impeccably....It's like someone laughing in your ear, challenging you to figure out what to do when you don't know what to do. It humbles you. It opens your heart.

                                                   Pema Chödrön

Friday, February 05, 2010


How blessed I am to be here on this earth.  I am thankful to have this and every day that I am given.