Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Words of Experience and Wisdom
A most thoughtful and profound comment about my last post from wonderful Lucy my friend who blogs at Lucy's Golden Spiral Journal.
"This is such a heartbreaking situation. I went through the same thing with my mother and I can see Carole is going to have to do it with me. It's just a matter of time---some of us have a bit more with our facilities intact. But it is inevitable unless we mercifully suddenly drop dead in the middle of sex or a golf game.
Believe me, I'm not trying to make light of the situation. I hate and fear it as much as anybody. However, the cycle---including decline and denial is inevitable for most of us---parents and children alike.
I think the only thing to remember is that far from being alone, you are part of an eternal cosmic continuum that allows all of us to grow---or not.
Curiously enough I had a heated discussion yesterday on this very subject with Carole. After seeing 2 confused, blind and twisted old men I said that I wanted to be "put to sleep" when I reached that point. I still feel that way. However, Carole said every person has a job to do as long as they live on earth. The job for the terminally afflicted young or old, she says is to provide the opportunty for others to give and to learn acceptance.
I'm not sure about that. However, it's something to think about. My point to you in the situation is that as unfair as it may seem it appears the Creator is giving you an opportunity. You can't change your mother or her ultimate decline but you can give up the illusion of having control and being a victim of the inevitable....or you can remind yourself once again and all too soon it's just another chance to choose life and growth. And to remember you are not alone."
all my love and prayers,
Thank you Lucy for the loving reminder that none of us are in control - and it is another growth opportunity, whether we want it or not. Thanks too for all the other loving and thoughtful comments. Taking another step on the journey - not alone - surrounded by love, care, and kindred spirits.