Thursday, October 12, 2006

My Beating Heart

Saturday is twenty-three months since Tom died. My heart beats so ferociously at times. The sadness sneaks up on me without warning. I made my dinner tonight and when I put the food on the plate all I could think was how much he would have liked to eat that dinner. I went to the store after work tonight and on the way home just burst into tears, Crying in the car = the widda way of life. I miss my husband. I am vulnerable tonight. Just longing for his smile, his arms, his kisses, his laughter from the other room. Oh my sweet darling. Forever in my heart.

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6 comments:

  1. dark star10/13/2006 12:42 PM

    and sometimes you see someone who looks like them or has the same walk or mannerisms I know how you feel but like they say one day at a time

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  2. Sky10/13/2006 1:37 PM

    it is still early in your grief, suzann. you will have these powerful moments of missing tom followed by less intense moments when you see your progress into the future you are now creating more specifically focused. there is the ebb and flow to grief just like the ebb and flow in life. some days will find you distant to your pain and others will find you smack, dab in the middle of it. that is life.

    some days we are moving and others we seem to be sitting still. but, we really are never sitting still...we are simply feeling ourselves from different perspectives.

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  3. Joy Des Jardins10/13/2006 6:22 PM

    Oh my sweet friend....my heart is with you...and aching. You'll get through this day just as you have all the other days that found Tom in your every thought. I truly know how you feel Suzann....and I'm sending you so much love dear friend... -Joy -xo-

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  4. OldLady Of The Hills10/14/2006 5:54 AM

    Oh, Suzann...I feel for you, my dear...It must be such an overwhelming thing when these waves of grief and pain come upon you...A very hard day, to say the least...I send you hugs, dear Suzann.

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  5. Anonymous10/18/2006 1:05 AM

    No matter how much time passes, grief continues to come in waves, doesn't it? Thinking of you.

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  6. Rain Trueax10/22/2006 2:48 PM

    This is a blog and he is going through what you are. His last blog was a poem that I think you would enjoy reading--http://rvtravelswithhuggy.blogspot.com/

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