I am feeling better. I took your advice and kicked off my shoes, had a drink of cool water (and some wine), took a nap, walked in solitude, reflected on my experiences of the past 6 months and tucked all my blog sisters' comments and thoughts safely in my heart. Moving forward - taking some giant steps, some baby steps - there is momentum and greater clarity. Thank you.
Here I am at another birthday time of year. This time of year has always been precious to me. Time to reflect on the year just passed and the year ahead. Birthdays have never bothered me much - you know, "OMG, I am (fill in the blank) - I am getting soooo old" - just hasn't been part of my repertoire.
I am very blessed to be strong and healthy. I have always enjoyed that irrepressible excitement and enthusiasm for life; the kind of enthusiasm that bubbles up spontaneously from deep in your bones.
As my birthday rapidly approaches, I don't feel like what I imagined 65 - going on 66 - would feel. (And no, sixty is NOT the new forty - gack! It is 60, thank god.) I treasure the years I have been on this earth. I feel so blessed to still wake up each morning and have the privilege to learn, grow, serve, make mistakes and still be in my earthly body.
This birthday is interesting because I can see down the road towards seventy. It is not a vision in the far distant future. It is a point that is within reach in a relatively short period of time. Of course, those of us who have lost people very close to us know, anything can happen in the next minute, but until then - 70 is within my grasp.
I feel a sense of excitement. There is something out there just beyond my sight, I do not know what it is. But I feel it, at times it takes my breath away. I have no idea if it is personal, professional or a combination of both. I will quietly and patiently wait. The vigil and pilgrimage have begun.