This has been a really quiet blog month for me. I returned from California on June 11 and was immediately immersed in work and continuing to help my mother. The time has come for me to provide additional support to her by having someone else pay the bills. This was a hard thing to do but needed. She has agreed and is by turns: relieved, sad and a bit angry. I understand, as much as I can from my seat in life's stadium.
I am on my way back to California on Tuesday to help with the actual move and get her settled in her new home.
Tomorrow is my birthday - this time of year is always a time of reflection and taking stock. It is sobering to watch the decline of one's parent. She is in her mid-eighties and has been incredibly healthy and active for most of her life but still, this is the beginning of new stage. Between aging and reality of death - that I know well - it has me thinking about what I want to do.....right now, I am doing it. But, what about next year? What about 5 years? This year I have been practicing mindfulness - doing meditation and trying to live in the moment. One can live in the moment all you want - the question is still out there - what shall I create next in my life. If I am no longer on the planet - so be it - if I am, I want to be doing those things that bring me joy and completion.
For today, I am exactly where I am meant to be. Right here and filled with gratitude for all my blessings. Om Shanti.
Happy Birthday. I hope your year ahead will be a joyful one.
ReplyDeleteSuzann...Happy Birth Day!
ReplyDeleteI know it's hard to watch your parent get older. My Mom is in her 80's also and I don't get to see her enough..she lives in Wyoming and I live in Georgia. I know that my sister is taking good care of her but it is still hard.
I too am thinking about what I want to do in this life. I've lived one day at a time for so long but now I too want to be "doing those things that bring me joy and completion".
I can't wait to see your next blog to tell us how you spent this B'day..