If this has happened in your life, I am really interested in hearing how you felt and how you responded to the person.
If this has not happened in your life, I am interested in what you think about this type of encounter.
Just to be clear, I am not talking about posting derogatory things about anyone. If you are so moved to share your perspectives, I will read your experiences, and opinions with great interest.
I am doing fine - this has been an intense and rewarding week. I will do my best to post a longer piece later today or this weekend.
I haven't had that happen but I also don't write about my family or friends other than my husband and he gets to see everything I say about him before I publish it. I do find people finding fault with what I write but that's because they disagree with my ideas...
ReplyDeleteThe man I am involved with felt "ganged up on" by comments I received after posting about a problem we were having. The comments were mostly in my favor. Also, my brother was offended when I wrote about some family issues. He posted a negative comment in reply. He thought I was taking gibes at him.
ReplyDeleteI have strongly wished that I never told my brother about my blog because he now reads it and I am uncomfortable knowing that. I have refrained from writing about family issues unless it is very generic. I also wish my guyfriend did not read my blog. I have considered asking both to stop reading but then my guyfriend kind of took offense and told me it was rude to do so.
Unfortunately, instead of being a catalyst for discussion, growth and healing, the incident with my brother did not go anywhere. But that relates to my family having difficulty with facing issues and talking about them. The situation was just kind of dropped and forgotten.
I did not apologize for what I wrote as the identity of the parties is never revealed in my posts. There was nothing disrespectful or rude about what I revealed. It was open, honest and what I thought to be neutral. What happens when you post, however, is that situations can come across as very one-sided. That is why I think there can be problems.
None of us like to see or hear less than flattering portrayals of ourselves revealed even if they are accurate. It kind of hits us in the gut. Most people are not able to process constructive criticism with grace - the immediate response is defensiveness.
I have closed my blog except to invited readers, because my boss feels that posts I wrote about her and my job were "damaging". I don't see them that way, but since we now have legal proceedings between us, I am being more careful. It makes me less inclined to write on my blog, which is sad.
ReplyDeleteA blog that never leads to a negative response from a family member or friend is either one that tip-toes around touchy matters, or is written by someone of a saintly disposition, or is written by someone who has undergone a lobotomy.
ReplyDeleteI think the suggestion posted above is a good one if a person wants to write a blog that might be painful to others but that person feels a need to vent or get other people's thoughts-- make it private. It could be done by opening up the subject to see who had a similar need and having a variety of authors who need the same kind of outlet. A blog does not have to be a journal of daily living, fellow workers, friends or family members; but when it is, then deciding whether to make it public is a valid consideration. The question I would ask myself is why would I want someone to read it from a blog rather than hearing it directly from me? Sometimes though we need to share frustrations and we should decide where the venue is best. There is that saying that we tell people something when they are part of the solution or part of the problem.
ReplyDeleteNope,
ReplyDeletenot so far.
If so would have occured, I would have made a phone call to ask what is this about.
If still not stopping I would feel such a thing very abusing.
And take actions thereafter.
If this really have happende with you, I'm really anxious. Realy I am.
You may write to me about it, as I think this is very sensitive.
hugs
from across borders and miles and oceans
T
I'm still fairly new at blogging. I've not had this happen. Apparently you have and I'd be interested in hearing how you handled it.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your thoughtful comments....I appreciate your perspectives.
ReplyDelete